One day when I'm not broke I'll kiss my boys goodbye

[debs]

It's a little weird to say, but I feel like this song explains my relationship/experience with fandom.

"Djuna!" by Frida Hyvönen

Djuna!
Frida Hyvönen

Someday when I'm not broke
I'll kiss my boys goodbye
Their embroidered handkerchiefs waving me off
Someday when I'm not broke
I'll kiss my boys goodbye
Their embroidered handkerchiefs waving me off

Djuna the boys aren't ok
they make me regress and forget my aim
Need to get them out of my way
Can you support me in this?

I remember second time I saw them
still long before they were mine
They were deep in each other's eyes
Stepping in they didn't seem to see me
as I tried to leave they looked my way
and whispered "stay"

I have stayed a hundred times
I've been soaking up their velvet crimes
They've made me come
They've had me shine
and lately they've made me sigh

Last night when I was out I bought myself a drink
Opened the memories and violence poured out
Last night when I was out I bought myself a drink
Opened the memories and violence poured out

Djuna, things aren't right
I didn't make it through the night
I got into a fight and was hit by a man
Listened to the songs you didn't send
I loved the order you would have put them in

Djuna, tell me it's a piece of cake
a piece of art and a hell to raise
Some day when I'm not broke
I'll buy you a diamond ring
And we'll celebrate our love
until death comes

Comments

[romi.livejournal.com]

What an interesting reflection, and what an interesting lyric!

[shoelacedreamer.livejournal.com]

As much joy as all my various fandoms have given me, I sometimes think that they are "keeping" me from life. Which is silly, because if I really thought it was a problem, I'd quit. Maybe I'm just weak and scared and this is how I cope. I don't know.

But, hi, you! I've missed you. I sincerely hope all is well with you and yours. ♥

[romi.livejournal.com]

I can say without a doubt that my fandom activities function as stress relief for me, but they can easily take control over me as well, control to an extent I am uncomfortable with. Esp this happened before the family was expanded. I think your reflections are healthy.
All is well with me and us -- thank you. I hope the same for you.